Wednesday 27th Feb 🌞
Self care isn’t just about lush bathbombs and facemasks, it can be taking a day off from emails, taking the bus instead of walking or making yourself breakfast for the first time in months.
As you will be able to read from my personal diaries, I’ve really been struggling these last few weeks as I feel like time is ticking and everything is moving too fast but I’ve decided to try and seize some control back and vow not to submit another piece of coursework late this semester (and I mean after my extension finishes kind of late). Nobody is going to get me out of this cycle, there’s no ‘saviour’ so I’m going to have to do it myself and here’s how I plan to.
I’ve made a list of self care orientated tasks I honestly believe have the potential to change my life and make me that little bit happier so I’d thought I’d share my list..
Prioritise uni work one day a week
Since I find it very overwhelming to go out in the morning then find focus to do uni work in the afternoon or at night, I’ve decided to dedicate a whole day to core uni work each week. No uni related society work or admin, a whole day on core lecture content/revision/dissertation work. When I do uni work it makes me feel better about everything and not having to think about going out later/socialising that day means I will be able to concentrate on that and that only.
Have one or two set days a week to reply to emails that can wait
I read recently in a ‘How to not let your dissertation rule your life’ article that if you spend the first part of your working day, often when you are at peak concentration and creativity, answering emails, you are putting other people’s agendas above your own.
Not plan too many coffee dates
When I’m not coping, everything stresses me out and having too full a schedule turns me into a nervous wreck. Something I have always got anxious about despite my best efforts to tell myself it’s silly is catching up with friends over coffee but the problem is that this is the way most of my friends enjoy catching up. When I get there, I have an amazing time and I’m so glad I went. They are a positive thing so I am going to aim to do at least one a week, but what isn’t helping right now is putting pressure on myself to catch up with everyone. Those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind and all that jazz.
Spend less time on tinder
Don’t get me wrong I think tinder can be a really good laugh, some of the chat up lines and cheek of boys is ridiculous.
However I have been on one too many tinder dates recently where I’ve had a great time, felt a really connection, only to be told afterwards that they don’t want anything serious and we should just ‘keep it casual’.
I really wish I could do the whole casual dating thing but it’s just not my nature, my jealous streak can’t handle the thought of people seeing other people and to be frank, I think I’m now clear enough in my own head to say I want to be in a relationship at this point in my life.
Talking to guys is fun but it’s also very time consuming so I’m planning not to make any new tinder matches and let the guys I talk to on messenger message me first, I guess we’ll find out who’s actually keen this way and who’s not worth my time, time that could be spent focusing on myself.
Get back into eating regular meals
I didn’t think the whole meal planning thing I was doing was successful until I stopped and then now (a month or so later) I realise I haven’t ate a proper meal in weeks unless with my parents.
Ideally, all the meals would be healthy but trying to be realistic, it would be good just to get back into a routine of some sort and stop having Nutella on toast for dinner with Doritos for ‘dessert’.
Now all my birthday cake is finished, I do want to get back on track health wise so going to start watching my intake again, just no extreme diets just yet.
Get back in control of my spending
In the past month I’ve spent £67 on eating out and takeaways with another £70+ on nights out.
Buying overpriced food at the hospital for convenience or ordering a McDonald’s on uber eats because I’m too anxious to go to the shop round the corner doesn’t make me feel good at all.
Getting Uber’s after my tinder dates as too embarrassed to do the walk of shame or having to get one to class because I’m running late again.
Wasting money rightfully makes me feel guilty so from now on I’m going to try and reign it in. I’ve already said to my flatmate I’m going to try and give up takeaways for lent so we can see how that goes. I’ll replace Uber’s with buses and hopefully that will cut costs.
I can then afford to treat myself to things that do bring me happiness like clothes and makeup or even better, experiences, instead.
Your list of things to cut down on or do to actively improve your mental wellbeing, might be completely different from mine but I urge you to make one and try and stick to it this week, it may not strike you as standard self care techniques but I can guarantee it’s more effective than a bath bomb. Everyone will have different little things that stress them out but is there a way round them or alternative you can think of? There usually is